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Attention all mums!
Well, not all mums - just those who live in "Lame Cove"
I know this may come as a surprise to you, but scattered here and there are large green spaces known as parks. Granted, they are not within Cooee distance of a coffee shop, but they do exist.
"What is a park?" I hear you ask. I will tell you.
Unlike supermarket aisles, they are meant for little kiddies to run around, race up and down, scatter things around and all the other sorts of things you let your kids do in a supermarket.
I realise that spending quality bonding time with a friend you haven't seen since yesterday is important to you, (you make sure everyone else in the supermarket realises that as you block the aisles chatting) but frankly I have better things to do than side step your badly behaved kids, step over them as they sit on the floor, and avoid the greetings cards they have scattered on the floor in order to arrange them by colour or design.
Another thing. Why does it a take a not-quite-under-my-breath grumble, before you grab the kid and give me a gushing apology? If you can do it then - why not before!
It's bad enough trying to avoid the loaded trolleys of the shelf-stackers as they whiz around the store trying to out run the motorised wheelchairs with Australian flags flying from them, without looking out for anklebiter. And I can bet my sweet arse that if I should bump into your precious sprog - it is me who will get the bloody blame.
Come to down-town Lame Cove and experience the delight of shopping in an obstacle course combined with an athletics track and Grand Prix course.
Wherever you may be - be safe