It's Monday morning here - the start of the last business week before Christmas. Do you know what?
I am not interested in bilateral relations, bilateral cooperation or World Bank loans to countries whose leaders go around the cocktail circuit in Armani suits pleading poverty.
You know the sort of thing, "I call on the wealthy nations of the world to give generously to my country. A country where millions are starving to death and live without health services or clean water. Except of course for my family, my friends, my business associates, my pet cat Tiddles and anyone who can be of use to me".
So for the rest of the week, i On Global Trends will be a free-form Christmas Edition. Yes, that's right - Christmas. The same word I have used for nearly 50 years and will continue to use. I base that policy on the fact that I spend all year respecting the cultures, traditions and religions of others - and I expect the same in return.
If any nation or culture has a problem with that, I will set out to become Prime Minister of Orstralia and take the civilized course of action so beloved by leaders of the free world - and bomb the crap out of you goddam-sons-of-bitches. All in the name of democracy of course, (as long as you democratically elect someone I like, otherwise say goodbye to food supplies buddy).
Can't say fairer than that now can I?
OK, let's do Christmas!