The Grubs: Do you notice something missing?

There is something missing.

No - I don't mean Gerry's wallet stolen by the world's luckiest pickpocket. Trust poor old Gerry to be robbed in London, in a busy area, in a country where you can't even scratch your bum in public without it being picked up by CCTV cameras - especially around cash machines. Even in Sydney when I draw money out of an ATM machine, I comb my hair just in case a nice looking girl may be watching me on camera.

It seems no one saw anything and there appears to be no footage of the dastardly deed perpetrated by evil scum. Sorry about that, I am practicing just in case The Sun offers me a job.

No - there is something else missing. Would you like a clue?

OK, picture if you will, a tearful Gerry and Kate sitting in a studio, (their last appearance reminded me of the old "Holiday" program on BBC. All that was missing was a bunch of drunken tourists doing the Conga behind them).

"Whoever has taken Madeleine, please return her. We love her so much, Please we beg of you, find it in your heart to return our baby girl. We beg you to end our pain."

I have seen other parents of missing children make repeated public and tearful appeals, but how many times have The Grubs begged for the return of their daughter?

OK, I realise that when you are trying to flog tacky merchandise on a website that has now become some sort of personal holiday diary, it is pretty hard to fit in grovelling pleas for mercy - and Gerry doesn't strike me as the grovelling type somehow.

I bet it gets right up his nose to have some little Colonial snapping away at his heels. Well, Australia is a classless society and I can assure him there are times when I have no class at all!

Maybe I am wrong though. Maybe he is the type of chap who would say, 'I don't mind what you call me - as long as you don't call me late for dinner." Yep, I can seeing him saying that. It seems not even his children's lives come between Gerry and his dinner.

Another thing that seems to be missing, is any interest in any possible leads. Normally parents say "we know it's not much, but we are keeping our fingers crossed". Not good old Gerry, who is so far up himself that he gives the impression that the only time he gets aroused is when he looks in the mirror. Nope, St Gerry smugly laughs off all sightings and possible leads.

There are many things though that are not missing. Confidence.

The couple were confident and insistent that Madeleine could not have woken up.

They have been confident that none of the reported sightings would prove fruitful. So confident in fact, that they prefer to continue their damage control and revenues raising campaign instead of dashing off to Malta or Morocco, (left until last on the Grand Tour). Gerry had no problem dashing off to London for his "business meetings" did he though.

Gee, that phrase used by the family annoys me. "Business meetings" for God's sake. In an interview a couple of weeks ago, The Grubs were handed a letter by the grandfather of a missing German two year old. The letter said, "We know what it is like when a child is suddenly missing - gone without trace. You can hardly turn your mind to anything else." The Grubs soon knocked that theory on the head didn't they!

Incidentally, until then I had never heard about the missing two year old, and I doubt if the rest of the world had. Just goes to show that money can't buy you love - but it can buy you exposure.

They were confident that, "our children are fine as it is." That remark was made to hotel staff who were so concerned by the parents regularly leaving their children alone, that according to a Portuguese newspaper, the McCanns were offered -

"Walkie-talkies supplied by the hotel unit where they were on holiday"
"The service of nocturne baby-sitting that was included in the vacation package"
"Offer of a system very much used by parents of small children, since it allows to hear the sounds of them, to one determined distance".

I was going to say that they may as well have left Maddy in the middle of a busy parking lot - but at least then someone may have spotted her and looked after the poor little soul.

Maybe they are confident because they have reason to be.

***
One of my readers emailed me and raised a very interesting point. Kate McCann is a doctor, and our understanding is that in her position, she is legally obliged to report cases of child neglect.

Is Kate going to "dob" herself in? After all, the only things we know for certain in all of this, is that three children aged were three and under, were regularly left unsupervised by the parents. Not only that, if the above newspaper report is true - they deliberately refused every offer of supervision.

If that is not neglect - then perhaps the term needs to be redefined to take into account the public's definition.

But maybe an investigation is being carried out already. If so, it would explain many things about this whole affair. Including the reaction of the British press and British authorities.

Thank you: Thank you to readers who emailed and pointed me towards the article in the Portugese newspaper.