Come on Eileen

It never ceases to amaze me that there are people out there who believe I would take emailed threats and insults seriously. I have been involved in newsgroup flame-wars for nearly nine years - and some of those were good old no-holds barred, bare knuckle, stand toe to stuff. Ah, those were the good old days!

I am the first to admit that I know very little about women, so I am not sure if a lady I have traced to Norfolk, is either trying to insult me or play hard to get. The exchanges started off in the usual manner -

"Jeeeeeeez Mike, whatever happened to you in your sad life to make you so bitter & twisted..You've not got a heart, you've got a swinging brick"

I got so excited at what I thought was a compliment, I showed it to my mum. She said, "Mike, put your reading glasses on - she said 'brick'"

Tonight's was rather more eloquent.

"You look as old as my father, who, for the life of me, I can't imagine ever getting involved in a such malevolent situation as you have entered yourself into...At the end of the day, your karma will come round and bite you on the ass - beware !!! "

I'm not sure if she meant my karma will be karming round the mountain when she comes, but for one thing, I don't have a karma - I don't even have a cat.

Having my ass bitten? I learned a long time ago to cover that, so I am not too worried. As for looking as old as her dad - I don't know how old he is, so it's rather hard for me to gauge the effectiveness level of the alleged insult. I love that word "alleged"!

I am not sure if she ever attended any creative writing classes, I understand there are some very good ones around, but her sentence would have had far more impact if she had finished it at the word, "have" instead of pushing her luck and getting her linguistic knickers in a knot.

Mind you, she does know how to use commas which is more than I do, so I can't be too hard on the poor bugger.

I think she still has a long way to got beat the one posted to my photoblog - "I can't wait for the day you get AIDS and die".

It must be nice to have class.