The Grubs: The transformation of St Gerry

"The new poster of Madeleine has been designed in conjunction with the International Centre for Missing and Exploited Children (ICMEC) and this is one of the things we have been working on in the last couple of weeks.

ICMEC promote awareness of missing children globally and aim to prevent child sexual exploitation and abduction. The poster features 3 pictures of Madeleine with the advice to contact the local police if you see her. ICMEC, their logo and both theirs and our websites are also on the poster. The distribution of this poster will enhance the awareness of Madeleines disappearance, which we are advised increases the chances of finding her, and the plight of other missing children.

"the distribution of this poster will enhance the awareness of Madeleines disappearance"

No it wont. There is hardly anyone on the planet who is not aware of Madeleine's disappearance.

What it will do however is increase awareness of your revenue raising website, and awareness of an organisation partly reliant on donations as a source of funding. You might need treasured and irreplaceable photographs to remember what Madeleine looks like - I don't and neither do most others.

I was aware of the work of ICMEC when you thought the letters were just tiles in a Scrabble rack, and long before your carefully crafted transformation from couldn't-give-a-toss dad, to Patron Saint of Missing Children. I can not recall ICMEC launching such a high profile campaign for any other missing child. In fact, until St Gerry came along, I doubt if many people had heard of the organisation or their sister organisations.

My my, aren't you suddenly the caring little soul. After losing a child through premeditated neglect, you have become the saviour of the world's children. Tell me Gerry, is this the first step towards inclusion in a future honours list for services to the protection of children? Is that the next stage of the Grand Plan - Gerry McCann MBE? The final accessory needed to be a fully paid up member of the "right circles".

So far you have -

Turned in to a devout Catholic
Turned in to a poster child for at least two child welfare organisations
Started turning Portuguese.

When will you announce that you are turning in to a responsible loving parent?

One who doesn't use a creche in the same way other people use a cloakroom to leave inconvenient baggage.